So, I've been sleeping my ass off the last couple weeks. I thought it was just a thing, but it's totally not. Nat on the PCP sleeps a solid 10 hours. Dang -- I needed those extra two to get shit done. Like my dishes. Ahhh -- that sinister pile of dishes. Ramiro was a dear and did most of them for me today, but I could certainly overhear him grumbling about why we own so many in the first place. lol
OK -- so, I skipped a day. Ramiro was a champ and DIDN'T. Here's the story: I woke up and immediately felt overwhelmed. Yesterday was a pretty bad day at work (felt like I got absolutely nothing done) and the day itself didn't end until 9pm. I had anticipated being unable to work out due to lack of energy from my long-ass Tuesdays so I did it all in the morning. It was a nice slow start to the day and I didn't have to be into the office until noon, so no biggie there. Thing is, I never made time Sunday to do an all-out cooking fiesta and so, although I spent a friggin $50 at the farmer's mkt Saturday morning and then another $150 at Price Chopper Sunday, there's never anything ready to eat in the ol' fridgidaire. Dang.
So when I got up this morning, I cut up some broccoli for Ramiro and then thought about what I would want (not into the raw veggies -- sorry dudes) and then got a little mad. I looked at the dishes pile and then at the laundry pile and realized I had fallen asleep with my bra on (totally just zonked) and thought: fuck it. I am SUCKING at this PCP. I mean I could do all this if I was ONLY doing all this. But I'm not -- I'm doing a heck of a lot. And, to be quite honest, I'm cooking for two. Ramiro's skills in the kitchen are.. well, pretty close to nil. Double dang. So I crawled back into bed til 10am. (stupid flexible schedules making this sort of bad decision-making EASY!!).
I decided I would take a break for the day and try to get my shit back in order so that I wouldn't just KEEP dragging the undone stuff around in the back of my head and would feel a little better about my life-juggling skills. I ate some cereal for bfast & bought a curry chicken pita sandwich for lunch. Come to think of it, that's pretty much all I've eaten today. Virtually no veggies -- what a disgrace! Then I proceeded to have an OK day -- good movement on the climate activism front (able to secure a lift for an aerial 350 photograph -- have I told y'all about that?), but still kinda blah on the work front. Lots of assigned reading before a mtg tomorrow morning, so I could at least feel like I was keeping busy -- but certainly NOT what I would call productive.
Leave work. 350 organizer's mtg. choir. home. Then I made another lackluster decision. "I will not do exercises; I will cook." And I've been doing just that for the last 3 hours. Ramiro tried to help me out of that head space, but it was pretty firmly ingrained; I wanted to take a day off as a bit of a jump-start. Home made spaghetti sauce with spinach & mushrooms, zucchini/corn thing, potato curry, and some leftover corn cobs. Doesn't sound like much, but it'll make life hecka easier when i wake up tomorrow morning and think: what should I eat? (thereby breaking the get-made-and-crawl-back-in-bed-to-ignore-life issue).
Now I'm exhausted and I'm realizing I was in such a cooking frenzy that I skipped my measly apple/egg white/milk dinner. What a mess I am today. I guess I'll have the milk at least. Sorry for such a downer report y'all. Back on the bang wagon in the a.m.
Way to blog it out!
ReplyDeleteAs a person who has a relatively "easy" life (everything's set up and nothings crazy has changed for a couple years) I'm having a huge time management problem. Dishes keep piling up and trash always builds up. I take care of the "important" things to do and let the "taking care of my apartment" things slip.
ReplyDeleteYour in a transition period and I've been there, and it's hard. So it's important to take a breather and cope. I hope everything is get smooth. That's all I can really say (wish I could hook up a job).
Dudes can't cook unless they're like me and worked in the restaurant biz. Ram is still champ in my book.
Nathaly, you are one committed lady! Dare I say, over-committed? Either way, you're doing a LOT right now. Be gentle with yourself - you're bound to have an off day. We've all had days like that. It's GREAT that you're blogging it out. Also - the cooking? I can barely keep up with my own diet demands, so the fact that you're cooking for 2 on the PCP is heroic! Maybe Ram does all the cleaning if you're doing all the cooking??
ReplyDeleteI'm with them--hard to believe that you're doing so much and the cooking for two. That's heroic. And if you can't get a convenient mid-autumn festival holiday, then you should take a day to relax. Hope it all feels more in control today.
ReplyDeletethanks for all the support y'all! the big thing i've dropped from my day to day schedule is job searching and that's VITAL, so i got cut back on this organizing stuff, but it's sooo fun! Just yesterday night i fell asleep envisioning how to coordinate the logistics of one of these: http://www.flickr.com/photos/350org/sets/72157622455212282/. Wish me luck!
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